It’s no secret that over here we’ve been dealing with
secondary infertility, which is, in layman’s terms, not being able to conceive
after having a successful pregnancy or live birth.  Since it’s National Infertility Awareness
Week, I saw it fit to include advice and tips from an infertility expert, Mindy
Berkson, Founder of Lotus Blossom Consulting. 

“My goal is to thoroughly
comprehend my clients’ needs, enabling me to successfully address the
financial, physical and emotional stressors that often accompany the family
building process. Providing uncompromising guidance and support, which
surpasses their expectations, is truly rewarding.”

Eighteen years ago, I was confronted with my own infertility
struggles after having a successful first pregnancy.  Eventually, I was diagnosed with secondary
infertility. Over several years’ time, I went through numerous insemination
cycles and several in vitro fertilization cycles before becoming pregnant with
twin boys. Treatment was difficult, both physically and emotionally.
Going through all of this instilled in me a desire to help
others through their own infertility struggles, which eventually led me to
start my own company, Lotus Blossom Consulting. Here are the lessons I learned,
not only from my own treatment, but also from the sum of over seventeen years’
experience working in the industry.
Lesson number one, have an open mind. It’s so important to
never lose sight of the family building goal. This doesn’t mean you won’t
grieve. It just means that the focus needs to shift to being open and receptive
to the possibilities. With technology and science, we are so fortunate to have
opportunities!  The pathway to parenthood
just may be different than what was originally planned.
Lesson number two, build the foundation for treatment;
financially, physically and emotionally. Become your own best advocate.  Know what questions to ask each industry
professional or seek the help of an infertility consultant to help guide you
with an insider’s approach to maximizing your chances of success. Making
informed decisions involves educating yourself about your diagnosis and the
available treatment options for your condition. It means realistically
analyzing the chance of success for each treatment option in light of your
financial situation.
Additionally, do your insurance homework to ensure that you
maximize all your lifetime benefits. Plan for multiple cycles to
rebound in the event of a failed attempt. 
If you are using a third party, identify the best possible resources for
donors or surrogates. Identifying a candidate that closely meets your criteria affords
a confidence level for the cycle, and with resources available nationwide,
there is no need to settle for a candidate.
Lesson number three, remain hopeful.  Everyone experiences infertility in a
different way and at different times. The greatest advice I can give is to find
what works best for you. For some, it may be finding a support group; for
others, it may be seeking out an individual counselor. Communicate honestly and
openly with your partner and share all the ups and downs of the journey. Above
all, remember to be patient and kind to yourself. Stress will never positively
affect the outcome. Remaining optimistic, while being prepared to continue your
fertility journey, will remind you to stay focused on what’s most important –
preparing for your baby.
Thank you, Mindy for providing these helpful tips!
About the Author
Mindy Berkson is an infertility consultant with 17+ years of
helping intended parents. She founded her consultancy, Lotus Blossom Consulting,
after she had her own experience with infertility and felt a total absence of
resources to help her navigate the complicated process or even just to help her
know the right questions to ask. Now considered an expert in the industry,
Mindy has been that resource for thousands of intended parents; gay men,
lesbian couples, heterosexual couples and both single men and women. More than
700 babies have been born as a result of Mindy’s resources, knowledge and
For more information about Mindy and her work, visit

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Kim S.
Kim is a 30-something-year-old wife and do-it-all mom of two beautiful daughters; her rainbow babies. Kim uses Beauty and the Bump NYC, to share her perspective about the things that she loves most and finds beautiful: family, travel, cars, food and more. As a contributor to A Girl’s Guide to Cars, Kim shares her love for cars through providing helpful tips and car reviews from the perspective of a modern working mom.