Blogger Jessica C.
and her husband, both in their early 30’s have been trying to conceive their
first child for over 5 years.
Did
you tell people you’re trying to conceive or did you keep it a secret?
you tell people you’re trying to conceive or did you keep it a secret?
We told immediate family and very close
friends.
friends.
Do
you feel pressure from your spouse, family or friends to have a baby? If so,
how does that make you feel and how do you deal with it?
you feel pressure from your spouse, family or friends to have a baby? If so,
how does that make you feel and how do you deal with it?
From
my mom; I’m an only child and their only hope for grandchildren.
my mom; I’m an only child and their only hope for grandchildren.
When
did you realize you were unable to conceive naturally? How did you feel?
did you realize you were unable to conceive naturally? How did you feel?
We knew there would be a problem before
we started trying- he is diabetic (sugar is out of control) and I never had a
regular cycle. Our insurance stated we had to document trying on our own for a
year before we could even speak to a specialist. We had it documented 6/2009
(married in May) and saw a specialist in July 2010 after temping and using
ovulation kits for a year. That’s when we officially found out that I have PCOS
and he has severely bad count/motility.
we started trying- he is diabetic (sugar is out of control) and I never had a
regular cycle. Our insurance stated we had to document trying on our own for a
year before we could even speak to a specialist. We had it documented 6/2009
(married in May) and saw a specialist in July 2010 after temping and using
ovulation kits for a year. That’s when we officially found out that I have PCOS
and he has severely bad count/motility.
How
does the word ‘infertility’ make you feel?
does the word ‘infertility’ make you feel?
Sad.
I hate to think that we’re “infertile” because we’re not, we just
need help to make things happen.
I hate to think that we’re “infertile” because we’re not, we just
need help to make things happen.
What
do you believe is the biggest misconception about infertility?
do you believe is the biggest misconception about infertility?
That
it’s wrong to use science to help you conceive. I hate being told that if I
were meant to be a mother, I’d have a child naturally- I can’t accept that it’s
just not meant to be.
it’s wrong to use science to help you conceive. I hate being told that if I
were meant to be a mother, I’d have a child naturally- I can’t accept that it’s
just not meant to be.
How
has infertility and TTC affected your personal relationships?
has infertility and TTC affected your personal relationships?
Horribly! We fight, we resent each
other- or really I resent him. After seeing a specialist in 2010 we knew we had
to try IUI to conceive but insurance covered nothing and we couldn’t afford it.
So things were put on the back burner but my husband strayed for a bit and a
whole lot of complications came along causing us to put our attempt to conceive
on hold until 2013. When we saw a new specialist with better insurance we found
out that his Diabetes not being controlled had caused his sperm to worsen and
now our only hope is IVF. I can’t help feeling mad at him that we postponed because
of his selfishness.
other- or really I resent him. After seeing a specialist in 2010 we knew we had
to try IUI to conceive but insurance covered nothing and we couldn’t afford it.
So things were put on the back burner but my husband strayed for a bit and a
whole lot of complications came along causing us to put our attempt to conceive
on hold until 2013. When we saw a new specialist with better insurance we found
out that his Diabetes not being controlled had caused his sperm to worsen and
now our only hope is IVF. I can’t help feeling mad at him that we postponed because
of his selfishness.
What
have you learned about yourself and personal relationships through this
journey?
have you learned about yourself and personal relationships through this
journey?
I’m more determined than ever to have a
child, but my husband strayed for a bit and a whole lot of complications came
along causing us to put our attempt to conceive on hold until 2013. When we saw
a new specialist with better insurance we found out that his Diabetes not being
controlled had caused his sperm to worsen and now our only hope is IVF. I can’t
help feeling mad at him that we postponed because of his selfishness, and is
unbelievably selfish and immature. I’m no longer certain he’s the man who
should father my children.
child, but my husband strayed for a bit and a whole lot of complications came
along causing us to put our attempt to conceive on hold until 2013. When we saw
a new specialist with better insurance we found out that his Diabetes not being
controlled had caused his sperm to worsen and now our only hope is IVF. I can’t
help feeling mad at him that we postponed because of his selfishness, and is
unbelievably selfish and immature. I’m no longer certain he’s the man who
should father my children.
Who
has been your biggest source of strength and support throughout your journey
TTC?
has been your biggest source of strength and support throughout your journey
TTC?
My best friend. It took 3 IUIs for her
to conceive her son, she’s the only friend I have who truly understands what
it’s like to want something so badly and have to work so hard for it.
to conceive her son, she’s the only friend I have who truly understands what
it’s like to want something so badly and have to work so hard for it.
How
do you deal with the stress of TTC?
do you deal with the stress of TTC?
I
cry a lot. I enjoy wine in between treatments. For the most part, I just vent
to my friend. I’m also a part of several support groups on Facebook and Google+
which are tremendously helpful.
cry a lot. I enjoy wine in between treatments. For the most part, I just vent
to my friend. I’m also a part of several support groups on Facebook and Google+
which are tremendously helpful.
What
would you tell other women and couples struggling with infertility and losing hope of ever getting pregnant?
would you tell other women and couples struggling with infertility and losing hope of ever getting pregnant?
Don’t give up! You never know when
things will come together and you’ll get your miracle. It’s hard and it’s sad,
but it will be worth it.
things will come together and you’ll get your miracle. It’s hard and it’s sad,
but it will be worth it.
Why
do you think it’s important for you to share your story about infertility and
TTC?
do you think it’s important for you to share your story about infertility and
TTC?
Because
I’m sad to hear women who think they have to hide their struggles. I think it
shouldn’t be hidden, people should know that’s it’s more common than they
think, so that they can support their friends.
I’m sad to hear women who think they have to hide their struggles. I think it
shouldn’t be hidden, people should know that’s it’s more common than they
think, so that they can support their friends.
Is
there anything you would have done differently?
there anything you would have done differently?
I
would have pushed for more information, maybe gotten 2nd/3rd opinions when we
first started out.
would have pushed for more information, maybe gotten 2nd/3rd opinions when we
first started out.
You may keep up with Jessica and her
story by visiting her blog: stumblingalongthrulife.blogspot.com
story by visiting her blog: stumblingalongthrulife.blogspot.com
If you’re interested in having your
story featured, check out my post “Resolve
to know more…” . I’m still recruiting people to [anonymously]
interview to raise awareness during Infertility Awareness Week, which is April
20th – April 26th.
Visit NIAW Blogger’s Unite Challenge to read more blog posts on the theme: “Resolve to know more…”
story featured, check out my post “Resolve
to know more…” . I’m still recruiting people to [anonymously]
interview to raise awareness during Infertility Awareness Week, which is April
20th – April 26th.
Visit NIAW Blogger’s Unite Challenge to read more blog posts on the theme: “Resolve to know more…”